somethings you might want to work on is,
Separate paragraphs, that are separated by pictures of the yoyo. also, include some stuff like, What your first impressions were when you un-boxed it, What it felt like in the hand, how it played horizontally, and stuff like that. It’s also good to wait a few weeks before reviewing something to let the, “New Toy” effect ware off. i plan on writing a review of it as well, but I’m going to wait until mid Oct to write it, so i make sure that my review isn’t based off of the excitement of getting a new yoyo.
Keep up the good work 